Just Five More Minutes…

The sounds of my alarm going off at 4:50 AM every morning is equivalent to the sounds to Kourtney Kardashian’s voice, unbearably annoying. As I hit the snooze button EVERY morning, I think to myself “Just five more minutes” and every morning I make broken promises to myself that I would wake up in five minutes.

Forty-five minutes goes by and there I am, still sleeping with my mouth wide open, arms behind my head dreaming of Care Bear’s and Skittles…just tasting the rainbow. While lying in bed, I am convinced that I will never ever wake up and like normal people do, I finally get out of bed.

If you need to visualize this (See figure 1). Here is a photo of me sleeping on a Sunday afternoon. If you had to rate my REM cycle on a level from the movie Inception I would be at level 5, Limbo.

Figure 1.


Believe me, I have tried everything to get my ass out of bed. I have had my husband turn the fan off and if that doesn’t get me out of my coma, he turns on the lights. THE LIGHTS! You would think this would wake me up but you are sadly wrong.

The last and final attempt is when he rips the comforter and sheets off me, now he has my attention and I am not happy about it. I whip up and look at at him with my eyes crossed, mouth guard in place (I grind) and hair like Bon Jovi circa 1989 #cute. Without any hesitation, he looks at me, gives me a kiss (yes, the mouth guard is still in tact, he really loves me) and softly says “It’s time to wake up, Love!” #Awwww.

My point to this story is that no matter how early you go to bed, or how great of a husband you have to wake up to every morning, waking up at 4:50 AM sucks!

Oh and one more thing, when someone says they are a “morning person”… thats just bullshit.

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